Stick Savior

You defeated Princess Kenny and recovered the Stick of Truth

Face Hoff

You defeated Princess Kenny while looking like David Hasselhoff

Irritable Bowels

You shat your pants during a boss battle

Friends in Strange Places

You befriended both crab people and gnomes

Shopaholic

You have collected half of the available costume sets

Elven Hero

You defeated the Grand Wizard Cartman in battle

Stay Down

You farted on 10 enemies in the world that were knocked out

More Popular Than Jesus

You made friends with half of South Park

Nonconformist

You befriended the Goths, like everyone else playing this game

Daddy Issues

You befriended your father

Chinpoko loco

You collected 15 Chinpokomon

Parkeologist

You opened all of the garages in South Park

Make it Rain!

You've spent $500

Junk Peddler

You sold 300 junk items

First Day in South Park

You completed your first day in South Park

New Kid On The Block

You have joined the KKK

Mastery

You've unlocked all of the upgrades for a New Kid ability

Weapon Proficiency

Over the course of the game, you've scored 100 perfect attacks

Are We Cool?

You found Jesus while playing as a Jew

Skilled Defender

Over the course of the game, you've blocked 100 attacks

Made This for You

You flung a turd of your own creation at an enemy

Poco Chinpoko

You collected 5 Chinpokomon

Shutout

You successfully blocked every enemy attack in a single (non-tutorial) battle

Acceptance

You accepted your fate and chose the name Douchebag yourself